Welcome again, empresses, to Unapologetically Caged!
Your girl Phoenix Rising is back with another dose of unfiltered truth, and today we’re diving into something every woman needs to hear: how to love yourself on a low budget—or even better, without a budget at all. Yes, your natural self. The you that you see when all the artificial things are stripped away… yeah, Adam and Eve style.
Alright, alright, let’s jump into it! laughs
The Great Humbling: When Prison Becomes Your Reality Check
Everybody has heard the term “Baddie on a budget,” right? Well, imagine not having ANY stores to shop at. No makeup varieties for your skin tone, no Fashion Nova, no Shein, or Temu (Oh yeah, y’all think I didn’t know about that, huh? Yeah, stop playing with me). Also, no $200 lace fronts, no braided hair extensions, and not even those $20 wigs on the mannequins to hide your beautiful natural hair textures.
When I say being locked up humbles you, sweetie, TAKE MY WORD FOR IT!
There’s no more hiding those dark spots and blemishes behind 30 pounds of beauty products. Those days of hiding your God-given kinky, coily hair under lace fronts because you’re afraid of discrimination? DEAD, DONE, FINITO!
The real you shows up in that DOC mugshot, honey. And let me tell you about my grand entrance into the system…
The Great Hair Disaster of 2023 (Or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love My Roots)
I went into the Women’s reception center with box braids—I’m talking
about SLAYYYEEDD! Just for the officer to look at me and say, “Oh yeah… whatever that is, it’s got to be taken out, like YESTERDAY.”
I’m like, “Uhhh, ‘whatever this is’? Oh wow!!! Okay, cool, so F me and my braids, alright. GOTCHA.”
So there I was, taking my hair out, and it was shrunken all the way down because I had to take an icy shower before taking my picture. Oh, it was bad—I mean, just a hot mess! My eyelashes had already fallen off while in the county, and for the ones that didn’t fall off naturally, all I’m going to say is pray for them because, cough, cough, naked mole rat alert!
And don’t even get me started on what happens to the ladies with dreadlocks. Oh, that’s it—they get their heads shaved and are now automatically labeled “studs” or “dykes” by force because they’re baldheaded. If you have a low cut in prison, people automatically assume you’re presenting as masculine. Shakes head Mmm mmm mmm.
Now I had no choice but to face every single insecurity that I was hiding from and running from in the free world. I had no choice but to do one of two things from this point on: Either boss up and embrace the real me, orrrrrr… throw a pity party and self-hate for the rest of my stay.
What are we choosing, empresses????
GREAT! We’re going with door #1! Nice choice and brilliant idea.
Phoenix’s “Baddie in a Hurry” Survival Guide
Now, I’m going to give you ladies a comprehensive guide on being a “baddie in a hurry”— because sometimes life doesn’t provide you with time for a whole glam routine, whether you’re behind bars, broke, or just learning to love yourself naturally.
TIP #1: HYGIENE IS YOUR HOLY GRAIL
FIRST THINGS FIRST: Hygiene, hygiene, and I cannot stress this enough—HYGIENE!
As a young woman, your hygiene should always take priority over everything else. If you don’t do anything else, do these two things: brush your teeth and shower DAILY. Not every other day, not whenever you remember, not when the mood strikes you—DAILY.
And don’t use that tired excuse, “Oh, I didn’t have time.” Uh-uh. If you have time to apply mascara and lipstick, you can find time to bathe. I’ve done about eight confinement bids, so trust me when I say 5-minute showers can go a long way if you know what to do.
The Prison Shower Speed-Run Method:
1. Wash the main areas first (lady parts, buttocks, underarms, and your face) 2. After that, more often than not, you’ll have time for your arms, legs, etc. 3. Quick rinse and you’re golden!
Now, don’t make 5-minute showers a habit in the free world—it’s just an SOS tool for emergencies. But in here? It’s survival, baby.
The key to good hygiene is that it lays the foundation for confidence. When you know you’re clean and fresh, you walk with a different confidence. You hold your head up differently. Even in the most basic prison-issued clothes, clean skin and fresh breath can make you feel like royalty.
TIP #2: HAIR CARE – WOR
KING WITH WHAT GOD GAVE YOU
Always find something to do with your hair, empresses. As a teenager or unemployed young adult, I don’t expect you to be spending $200 on lace fronts. But if you do have that kind of money and you got it through legal and constitutional means, then kudos to you. Put one aside for me when I get out! winks
But for real, as a teenager, box braids or twists are more age-appropriate anyway. When I was 14, I learned to do my own hair because my mom was already working long hours to pay bills, and I didn’t want to bother her for money for hairstyles. She always left us money for the day to get whatever we wanted, so I used my $20 to buy crochet hair.
My favorite hairstyle was crochet braids—it was quick, easy, and cute! I always purchased the loose and wavy hair, did some admittedly ugly cornrows (practice makes perfect, right?), and then crocheted the weave until I had a lion’s mane!
For my ladies with different hair textures: If you have more Caucasian or Latina hair texture, a sleek ponytail or some crinkled curls will definitely get you through the day or week. The key is working WITH your natural texture, not against it.
Prison Hair Reality Check: In here, I’ve learned that my natural hair is actually beautiful. Without the option to hide behind extensions and wigs, I’ve discovered curl patterns I never knew I had. I’ve learned to twist it, braid it, and yes, even rock a wash-and-go that would make the natural hair community proud.
The irony? Some of the most creative hairstyles I’ve ever seen have been in prison, where women are working with absolutely nothing but their natural hair, some water, and maybe a little commissary gel. Necessity really is the mother of invention!
TIP #3: SKINCARE – YOUR FACE IS YOUR FORTUNE
My FAVORITE department, honey! Your skin should be your prized possession because it’s the first thing people notice when they meet you. And I’m not talking about the makeup version either. Nah, anybody can have picture-perfect skin with the right amount of money or the latest Snapchat filter.
Oops, did I hit a nerve? Sorry, it’s okay. I’m guilty as charged, too. Pun not intended, BTW.
But what do we do when makeup is unavailable or when the temperature outside is 110°? What do you do then? Go natural. Correct!
The Phoenix Rising Skincare Philosophy: To boost your self-confidence, you must first care for your inner well-being. You can’t smoke cigarettes and drink alcohol like a pirate at a tavern and expect to have clear, glowing skin. It’s just not going to happen, babe.
Natural Skincare Basics:
• Drink your water! When you sweat out water, your pores are less likely to become clogged. I’m talking about REAL water, not soda, not juice, not those energy drinks that could probably power a small vehicle.
• Explore DIY skincare products designed to achieve clear skin, reduce dark spots, and manage acne. In prison, we get creative with what’s available—honey from the chow hall (when we can sneak it), oatmeal for gentle exfoliation, even using the basic soap in creative ways.
Prison Skincare Discoveries: Being incarcerated has actually significantly improved my skin care routine. Without access to all those harsh chemicals and over-priced products, my skin has learned to breathe and heal naturally. I drink more water than I ever did in the free world, I get consistent sleep (whether I want to or not), and the stress of constantly trying to look “perfect” is gone.
My skin isn’t perfect, but it’s REAL. And there’s something beautiful about that authenticity that no amount of makeup can replicate.
TIP #4: STAY ACTIVE – MOVEMENT IS MEDICINE
STAY ACTIVE!!! Oh, my goodness, how many of you ladies watch the scale more than you watch TV? Raises hand Guilty!
I am constantly checking to see if my fupa (that’s fat upper pubic area for those who don’t know) is extending and getting bigger than my butt. I am so self-conscious about my weight because I’ve been on this roller coaster for years.
My Weight Journey Through the Years:
• High school: Consistent size 7
• Depression era: Dropped to size zero because of excessive smoking and depression (not cute, y’all)
• First pregnancy: Bounced back up to size 7 with my daughter
• Stayed relatively thin after she was born, and her belly went back flat
• After catching my charge and having my son, I gained SO much weight due to alcohol
Yep, I had an alcohol problem as well! The gag is, I didn’t just gain weight—I swelled up like a puffer fish. And guess what? I NEVER DEFLATED! Nope, just stayed swollen like I was permanently bloated.
The Prison Fitness Blessing: Getting shipped to prison was actually a blessing in disguise because if I had never been locked up, I would have stayed home and never been motivated to stop drinking and lose weight. Prison forced me to confront my relationship with alcohol, my body, and my health.
Prison Workout Reality: In here, we work out with what we have—no fancy gym memberships, no boutique fitness classes, no personal trainers. We do push-ups in our cells, walk laps around the compound, and do squats during rec time. Some of the fittest women I know are right here in prison, and they built those bodies with nothing but determination and creativity.
The beautiful thing about prison fitness is that it’s purely for YOU—not for Instagram likes, not to impress anyone, not because society says you should look a certain way. You work out because it makes you feel strong, helps alleviate depression, and gives you something positive to focus on.
The Real Tea: What This Journey Has Taught Me
Being “unapologetically caged” has taught me that true beauty—that baddie energy—doesn’t come from external things. It comes from:
Self-acceptance: Looking in that metal prison mirror every morning and deciding to love what I see, stretch marks, dark spots, natural hair, and all.
Confidence: Walking into the day room with my head held high, not because my makeup is beat to the gods, but because I know my appearance doesn’t determine my worth.
Authenticity: Being the same person whether I’m dolled up or completely natural, because my personality and character are what truly make me beautiful.
Resilience: Proving to myself daily that I can be a baddie with absolutely nothing but my natural self and a positive attitude.
The Plot Twist Nobody Saw Coming
Here’s the real tea, empresses: some of the most confident, beautiful, magnetic women I’ve ever met are right here in prison. Women who have been stripped of everything—their freedom, their material possessions, their ability to hide behind makeup and designer clothes—and yet they RADIATE beauty.
Why? Because they’ve been forced to find beauty from within. They’ve learned that being a baddie isn’t about what you wear or how much money you spend on your appearance. It’s about carrying yourself with dignity, treating others with respect, taking care of your body and mind, and refusing to let circumstances dim your light.
Your Challenge, Empresses
Whether you’re reading this from your cozy bedroom or from circumstances similar to mine, I challenge you to have at least one “natural day” this week. No makeup, no expensive hair products, no designer clothes. Just you, your natural beauty, and your authentic self.
See how it feels. Notice if you walk differently. Pay attention to whether you smile less or avoid mirrors. Are you less confident? More confident? What does that tell you about where your self worth truly comes from?
The Bottom Line
Being a baddie on a budget—or with no budget at all—isn’t about finding cheaper versions of expensive things. It’s about discovering that you already have everything you need to be beautiful, confident, and magnetic. It’s about realizing that your worth isn’t in your wallet, your wardrobe, or your makeup bag.
It’s in your smile, your kindness, your resilience, your humor, your intelligence, and your ability to love yourself exactly as you are.
Prison has taught me that when you strip away all the external stuff, what remains is either genuine beauty and confidence, or insecurity and self-doubt. The goal is to build yourself up from the inside so that, no matter what life takes away from you, your light continues to shine.
Remember, empresses: You are not your circumstances. You are not your bank account. You are not your appearance. You are a beautiful, powerful, capable woman who deserves love— especially from yourself.
Stay unapologetically you, whether you’re caged or free.
With love and natural beauty, Phoenix Rising
Phoenix Rising is a 26-year-old mother of two sharing her journey of self-discovery and transformation while incarcerated. Through raw honesty and hard-won wisdom, she’s proving that true beauty and confidence come from within, no matter what life’s circumstances present.