Good morning, Empresses. Welcome back to Unapologetically Caged the space where I don’t dress up my story, I live it out loud. I’m Ruth, but most know me as Phoenix Rising. I’m 27 years old, a mama to two beautiful souls, and I am currently incarcerated. Today’s rising gem comes straight from my heart, my journal, and the quiet moments I spend on my knees asking God to help me say what my mouth just can’t figure out how to say.
If you’re between 18 and 30, if you’re figuring life out, if you’ve made choices you’re not proud of this one’s for you. Pull up a chair, Empress. Let’s talk.
The Mistake I Made Before I Learned to Pick Up a Pen
Let me be real with you I used to think the only way to release what I was feeling was to let it rip. Out loud. In somebody’s face. I was impulsive, I was emotional, and I reacted before I could even think straight. And here’s what nobody tells you: it’s not always what you say that costs you it’s how and when you say it. I have lost opportunities, friendships, relationships things I can never get back because I let my emotions do the talking before my wisdom had a chance to catch up.
Empress, I’m sitting where I’m sitting today in part because I didn’t have the tools to process what I felt in a healthy way. I don’t say that to scare you I say it because I want you to learn from the school of hard knocks so you don’t have to enroll the way I did.
Why Creative Expression Is the Best Therapy Nobody Told You About
Here’s something I’ve learned behind these walls that I wish someone had told me when I was 19, sitting on somebody’s stoop trying to figure out life: art has no wrong answers. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, not the critic. Art therapy whether it’s writing, painting, drawing, or throwing paint on a spinner canvas is one of the most powerful mental health tools available to us, and it’s accessible to every single one of you reading this right now.
More often than not, the words you have choked up inside of you the ones that won’t come out right when you open your mouth weren’t meant to be spoken first. They were meant to be written. Drawn. Released on paper until they’re ready to be spoken out loud.
“But Phoenix, I can’t draw. My stick figures look like aliens from Jupiter and Mars put together.” Sis, we are not presenting our work to Picasso. We are healing our minds. If your lopsided dog on that page made you feel even 10% lighter the goal was achieved.
Say a Prayer Before You Put Pen to Paper – Watch God Work
This is the part I want you to really sit with, because this changed my life inside these walls. Before I write anything — I pray. I humble myself and I ask God Almighty to help me express what I’m feeling, even when I don’t have the words. And every single time, something comes through. Something I didn’t even know I needed to say.
Think about this: Jesus himself communicated through parables simple, everyday stories that held layers of meaning. You could read the same passage ten years apart and hear a completely different message both times, because the message was always bigger than the moment. That’s the same power that lives inside your creative expression. The piece you write or draw today might speak a different truth to you in five years. And it might speak directly to the heart of someone else who reads it and says, “That is exactly how I feel.”
God is the mastermind of our whole brain’s function. He created you to be expressive. When you can’t find the words to speak, lean into Him and let your creativity become your prayer.
Writing Saved Me – And It Can Save You Too (Even If You Think You Have Nothing to Say)
Writing is my God-given gift. I didn’t always know that. But now I know that when I don’t know what to say in a situation, the best thing I can do is not say anything and write about it later. That’s not silence out of weakness. That’s wisdom.
There is a saying that gets twisted all the time: “Women are to be seen, not heard.” I want to flip that on its head for you today, because I’ve learned something more powerful: a woman who moves in silence is more powerful than a woman who is performing for the world 24/7. That doesn’t mean you silence your voice it means you choose when and how your voice is heard. And sometimes, the most powerful voice you have is the one that flows out through your pen.
I have read back pieces I’ve written and thought, “Did I really write this? Was this all me?” And yes, Empress it was all you. With God’s hand guiding yours.
For the Young Queens Who Are Still Finding Their Way: Please Read This
I’m writing this for the 18-year-old who thinks she has to react to every single thing. For the 22-year-old who is holding in so much pain she’s about to explode in the wrong direction. For the 26-year-old who keeps saying the wrong thing at the wrong time and watching doors close in her face.
I’ve been all of you. I know what it feels like to have so much inside and no safe place to put it. I know what it’s like to be angry and not have the emotional vocabulary to name it. I know what it’s like to react and then watch the aftermath and think, “Why couldn’t I just have stopped?”
So here is what I’m asking you to do. The next time you feel something you can’t contain:
1. Step away from the situation if you can.
2. Find a quiet space and say a prayer – even if it’s just, “God, help me.”
3. Pick up a pen, a pencil, a crayon – whatever you have – and let it out on paper.
4. Don’t judge what comes out. Just let it be.
Sis, you have too much potential, too much future, and too much God inside of you to lose it all in one unfiltered moment. Jobs, promotions, relationships, friendships they can all be impacted by what you say and how you say it. Protect your blessings by learning to express yourself in ways that serve you, not destroy you.
Your Creativity Is a Crown – Wear It
I’m not going to stand here – or sit here, rather – and pretend my road has been easy or that I’ve had it all figured out. I haven’t. I’ve made mistakes. Big ones. The kind that have consequences I’m still living with. But every single day I pick up my pen, say my prayer, and let God turn what’s inside of me into something worth reading – I feel more free than I ever did when I thought I was.
So today, Empress, I’m leaving you with this: Do not be afraid to speak your mind when the right moment comes. But also, don’t make so much noise that your message gets lost in the sound. A woman who knows when to speak and when to write is a woman who knows how to win.
You are your own masterpiece. Start acting like it.
With love, wisdom, and a whole lot of rising,
Ruth “Phoenix Rising” Moise
Unapologetically Caged | Still Rising
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