Welcome back, beautiful empresses of the world! Your girl Phoenix is back with another dose of raw truth, and today we’re diving deep into the meaning behind “Unapologetically Caged.” Grab your favorite beverage, get comfortable, and prepare for some real talk that might change how you see accountability, growth, and the beautiful mess we call life.
Breaking Down the Brand (Because Y’all Asked)
So what does “Unapologetically Caged” actually mean? What does it symbolize? Well, buckle up, buttercups, because it’s not what you might think at first glance.
It means embracing all the wrongs that I’ve done and taking accountability for them. Period. Point blank. No chaser.
Now, some people will misinterpret “Unapologetically” and associate it with being unremorseful for the incident that cost me my freedom. That couldn’t be further from Earth’s truth AND Jupiter’s truth—we’re talking intergalactic levels of wrong here, honey.
I am still in a constant battle with the truth of my crime, but I don’t deny it, nor am I under the assumption that my incarceration was a mistake by Goddie (that’s what I call God—we’re tight like that). The path that I was headed down was eventually going to land me six feet under the ground or exactly where I am writing you from, only worse—with a life sentence.
Phoenix: The Early Years (AKA The Hot Mess Chronicles)
I wasn’t always as encouraging or insightful as you will all come to realize with time. Oh no, no, no. I used to be a WILD CARD, and when I say wild, I mean like a tornado in a trailer park level of chaos.
I started smoking weed at 13 (because apparently, I thought being a teenage stoner was a personality trait), staying out late by age 14, fighting at school like I was training for MMA. My juvenile record is longer than my adult record—can you believe that? That’s just ridiculous and pathetic, if you ask me. Most of my charges were for fighting and running away, nothing too out of the ordinary by today’s standards, but still enough to keep the local police officers well acquainted with the Phoenix brand of drama.
When looking back, there was only ONE cause behind it all: Anger.
I was always so angry because I felt so lost in a crowd that I didn’t belong in. Here’s a life lesson for free, dolls: trying to fit in with a crowd will make you misunderstand yourself more than when you first tried. It’s like trying to solve a puzzle while someone keeps changing the picture—frustrating and ultimately pointless.
The Dangerous Game of Seeking Acceptance
I desperately wanted to fit in with the girls in the neighborhood, but I was never accepted. But you know who did take me? The boys on the block. They were all attracted to me, so of course I was “accepted”—and we all know that kind of acceptance comes with a price tag that’s way too expensive for a young girl to pay.
With that acceptance came the drugs, fake love, and premature, meaningless relationships. Trust me when I say that once that “she’s easy” reputation gets built on you, people start to feed your already weak ego with things that you want to hear. It’s like being hungry and someone offering you a sandwich made of lies—it might fill you up temporarily, but you’re going to be starving again real quick.
The saying “wolves in sheep’s clothing” is REAL, honey. These wolves can smell the lack of confidence seeping through your pores like cheap perfume. They sense the fear of rejection in
the way that you walk and talk. And guess what? That’s when people start to abuse you for their own gain.
The Many Faces of Abuse (None of Them Pretty)
Abuse isn’t just physical—it’s emotional, mental, and financial as well. It’s like a subscription service nobody signed up for, but somehow you keep getting charged for it anyway.
When the abuse starts to worsen and jump from person to person, it can either cause one to get depressed or angry—sometimes both, because life loves a two-for-one special when it comes to trauma. It starts building up like interest on a credit card you never wanted, leaving behind emotional scars in your brain and heart.
When the abuse becomes physical and leaves a permanent scar or bruise, it can make your self confidence slowly diminish. Those marks become constant reminders of what you put up with— not so much allowed, because let’s be clear, nobody “allows” abuse, but what you endured because you didn’t know you deserved better.
Years of unresolved issues, constantly being forced into silence, manipulation at the hands of people you care about—all of this can cause someone to lash out in a way they never thought possible. Sometimes you end up lashing out at someone who never did you wrong, but because you’re scared of letting those emotional walls down, you see only an enemy when God sent you a friend, an angel to guide you through your dark times.
The Caribbean Girl Gone Rogue
The life I was living was opposite to that traditional Caribbean upbringing my family tried to give me. If you know anything about Caribbean parents, you know they don’t play when it comes to respect, discipline, and keeping your act together. I was basically the poster child for “What NOT to do with a Caribbean upbringing.”
It caused me to be ashamed to be around my family, and eventually, I led myself astray. I was out here alienating myself from the people who, while they didn’t understand my dilemmas, would have been patient and guided me through them. Of course, they were already doing that, but being that hardheaded teen that I was, my favorite saying was “You don’t know what I’m going through!”
While that was true to some extent, being disobedient and disrespectful wasn’t helping me gain favor in my parents’ or siblings’ eyes either. So I was in double trouble—stuck between a rock and a hard place, with the rock being my stubbornness and the hard place being the consequences of my choices.
Prison Reality Check: The Humbling Experience
Being in prison has its ups and downs, but more often than not, you have more time to self reflect. And let me tell you, when you’re forced to sit with your thoughts 24/7, you either become very comfortable with yourself very quickly, or you go absolutely crazy.
I have two kids and a smart mouth, so let me give you a heads-up: in prison, those things don’t mix well AT ALL. It’s like trying to mix oil and water while someone’s shaking the container— messy and guaranteed to blow up in your face.
Having a rebellious attitude along with a smart mouth will lead you to ONE place, and that’s in a solitary confinement cell. And honey, let me tell you about solitary—it’s like being grounded by the universe, except the universe doesn’t bring you snacks or let you use your phone.
The Tears That Taught Me Everything
I’ve never cried so much as when I’m alone in my cell reading messages from my kids saying how much they miss me, or how they cried themselves to sleep because they miss my voice. Those messages hit different when you’re surrounded by concrete walls and the reality that you can’t just drive over and hug them.
Getting those encouraging messages from my fiancé sounds nice, but I know I disappointed him. My father sends me his proper good morning messages, signing them “Your lovely Father,” and he expresses how much it hurts when he wakes up and sees a message from me, knowing where I am. Talk about a guilt trip that no travel agent could ever book.
My mother—and if anybody knows the roller coaster history between my mother and me, this is saying A LOT—also cries when I’m locked down. When the woman who used to threaten to send me to military school starts crying over your prison sentences, you KNOW you’ve hit rock bottom.
The Wake-Up Call That Actually Woke Me Up
All of that emotional devastation was for what, though? To prove to an officer how much they had me messed up? Or to look tough in front of people who, when you get “packed out” (moved to solitary), forget about you like you guys weren’t just caffeine-high in the day room, slamming spades down on the table like you were playing for the World Series of Prison Card Games?
I witnessed firsthand that the majority of people wearing the same uniforms as you do not care about you. “Out of sight, out of mind” is the motto in prison. They should really make a banner—I’ll definitely talk to the captain and them about that at a later time. Perhaps we can also get some matching t-shirts while we’re at it.
Choosing What Matters: Family First
I realized that it’s essential to stand for something in life, and just as it’s important in the free world, there’s an even greater and more dire need in prison. You know what I chose? My family.
It took me a while to realize that family is forever, and family, despite the ups and downs, will stand with you when times get rough. They might not always understand your choices, they might cry, they might lecture you until your ears bleed, but they’ll be there.
Another lesson I came to realize is that I couldn’t be wholeheartedly teaching my kids about the Holy word of GOD, “Goddie,” and still letting my old ways guide me. It was like trying to be a GPS while I was lost—not helpful and definitely not reliable.
So I told the devil, “GET UP OFF ME!” and started praying while studying the word more. Trust me when I say I’ve slipped up A LOT on this journey, but every time I asked Goddie to take me back in and forgive me of my sins, He does. That’s the beauty of grace, y’all—it’s like a gym membership that never expires, even when you haven’t shown up in months.
The Recipe for Change (Spoiler: It’s Simple but Not Easy)
The difference now is that, in 2025, I really started to get tired of the old habits and games that I had been playing for the past 13 years. There comes a point when you’re just like, “This again? This happened AGAIN?”
Yeah, this again, because it’s simple: you use the same recipe, you’ll get the same meal. You take away a little spice, and everything might end up a little nicer in your world. Revolutionary concept, right? Who would’ve thought that changing your actions might change your outcomes? Insert eye-roll emoji here.
So I stopped throwing pity parties (though I was really good at them—could’ve won awards for “Most Dramatic Prison Breakdown”) and really sat down and asked God, “Goddie, what’s up, man? What am I here for? Why can’t I win an appeal and leave prison?”
The Divine Assignment I Didn’t Sign Up For (But Got Anyway)
The answer came clear as day: my story is here. My journey has already begun, and I can’t leave until I finish what Goddie has started. It’s like being enrolled in a college course you didn’t register for, but the credits count toward your life degree, so you should show up and do the work.
Since I started embracing my prison journey and began talking more to the big man in heaven, He’s been showing up and showing out! Just know that every gem that I drop, every word of empowerment that I share, isn’t only the work of Phoenix—GODDIE IS THE MASTER OF THE PLAN.
This isn’t just words for you all; these are things that I have gone through, learned from, am currently experiencing, and am growing to understand as well. I’m not speaking from a textbook or repeating something I heard in a motivational video. This is blood, sweat, tears, and transformation in real-time.
The True Meaning Revealed
That’s what it means to be unapologetically caged: Evolution in a place meant to keep you physically and mentally trapped.
It means owning every mistake without making excuses. It means taking accountability without drowning in shame. It means growing in a garden made of concrete and finding purpose in the last place you expected to discover it.
“Unapologetically Caged” doesn’t mean I’m proud of the choices that landed me here. It means I’m proud of the woman those choices are helping me become. It means I refuse to waste this experience by staying the same person who walked through these doors.
It means I’m going to use every single day of this sentence to become the mother my children deserve, the daughter my parents can be proud of, the woman God created me to be, and the voice that other women need to hear when they’re walking down the same dark path I once traveled.
The Evolution Continues
Every day behind these bars is another day of choosing growth over bitterness, hope over despair, purpose over self-pity. Some days I win that battle easily; other days, it’s a knockdown, drag-out fight with my old self. But every day, I show up to fight.
That’s what being unapologetically caged means to me—and I hope it inspires you to embrace your own journey of growth, wherever you are and whatever walls you may face. Because we all have prisons, honey, some are made of concrete and steel; others are made of fear, trauma, addiction, or limiting beliefs.
The question isn’t whether you’re caged—it’s whether you’re going to let that cage become your coffin or your cocoon.
I choose cocoon. Every single day, I choose transformation.
Welcome to the evolution, empresses. Let’s rise together.
Phoenix Rising continues to share her journey of transformation from behind bars, proving that our lowest points can become our launching pads when we choose accountability, growth, and faith over bitterness and blame.